Saw The Avengers with the girlfriend last week. She moaned when Chris Hemsworth’s name came on screen. Now it’s a Thor subject with me.
Saw The Avengers with the girl…
They say there are two sides t…
They say there are two sides to every story. What if it’s a story about a menage a trois?
I’m having a treat. A lollipo…
I’m having a treat. A lollipop called Man Bait. It is Maple Bacon flavored. http://t.co/7vLmRcJv
Anyone want to take a road tri…
Anyone want to take a road trip to Denever? http://t.co/VTzoF6Jk
I find it funny that on the bl…
I find it funny that on the blueprints for a McDonalds they call the back area the kitchen.
Almost had to go to the emerge…
Almost had to go to the emergency room for dehydration. I nearly ate the desiccant packet in my beef jerky bag. #eatingwhilegaming
Time to bitch about another st…
Time to bitch about another stupid person…me. Just spent 20 mins looking for drivers on Dell’s site….for a new HP computer. #fail
Just downloaded Free EP from F…
Just downloaded Free EP from Fitz and The Tantrums – http://t.co/ygIQig4D via @fitzandtantrums
To the person who keeps steali…
To the person who keeps stealing shit from my car. FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
Hey nose-picking, booger-eatin…
Hey nose-picking, booger-eating guy behind me at the red light… windshields are not made from one way glass.
Happy NOID! See you outside…..
Happy NOID! See you outside……http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=May%208
Double date night. Not 2 coupl…
Double date night. Not 2 couples, 2 girls! I have a date with the girlfriend AND the neighbor girl tonight. What is the opposide of FML? =)
I feel that naming the child c…
I feel that naming the child care center @ Memorial Hosp ‘Memorial Kids Kare’ is going to result in children that can’t spell the word care.
Rainy days and Mondays…..
Rainy days and Mondays…..
Made my chocolate mousse last …
Made my chocolate mousse last night. My neighbor calls it a panty dropper. :-) http://t.co/Tcrzr0QS
Dear Coworker…it’s 3pm and y…
Dear Coworker…it’s 3pm and you are STILL bitching about not being awake because you didn’t get your morning coffee? #getoveritalready
Can anyone recommend a hookah …
Can anyone recommend a hookah retail store in the Springs? I’m looking for a place with a large selection of hookahs and gear. #hookah
Wrote a joke today. Where do s…
Wrote a joke today. Where do salads go after a long day at work? A salad bar! I think my future in writing 4 Bazooka gum wrappers is a lock!
After a lot of thinking it ove…
After a lot of thinking it over, I’ve decided “My noodle would like to keep YOU company” is not a good pickup line to use at Noodles & CO.
I’ve been so happy lately! Do…
I’ve been so happy lately! Does anyone want my Adele CDs? I don’t need them anymore. =)